Savana Rinjani

 “Habis nangis ketawa, habis ketawa ya nangis.” Ungkapan yang entah muncul dari jaman kapan tapi benar adanya. Minggu malam gua dan Kinan telponan. 2,5 jam. Kalo bukan karena udah masuk jam tidur gua, kayanya bisa lanjut sampe berjam-jam. Kaya biasa, banyak yang diobrolin, life updates . Karena kami jarang telponan, jadi sekalinya telponan ga bisa sebentar. Dan isinya lebih banyak ketawanya. Senin pagi, sekitar jam 10, lagi WFH, tiba-tiba gua keinget suatu hal yang bikin gua sedih, terus nangis. Mungkin karena malemnya abis ngobrolin ini sama Kinan, jadi keinget lagi. Sebuah fakta yang ga bisa gua ubah, sekeras apapun gua berusaha. Kalo ini terjadi, gua takes time buat bersedih dan lanjut berdoa dalam hati: Semoga hati ini makin diluaskan dan dilapangkan untuk menerima kenyataan yang ada. Ameen. Abis doa terlintas kalimat di awal, iya ya abis ketawa ya nangis. Shit.

2021 was a true definition of a roller coaster for me. It was lots of surprises, from the biggest laugh to the silent tears. But, most of all, I’m so grateful I’m still breathing until this time. Quick update, the pandemic is still here and I'm still practicing WFH. Okay, so here’s my highlight for 2021. I wrote it in order of time. 1.        Getting out of my comfort zone: A speaker One of my friends from a college organization asked me to be a speaker on his online talk show. At first, I softly denied it because public speaking is something I dislike since a long time ago. I just don’t feel confident talking in front of people, it makes me anxious. But, eventually, I accepted it. It was an online event so I thought I can handle it.   The event was live via Instagram for around an hour. I talked about trail running, the mandatory gear, and some tips for beginners. I was so nervous at first, but it went smoothly later. I started enjoying the talk and d...